This is not another cliché about the political situation in Lebanon. I’m not asking you to all love each other and become one happy country, we will never all love each other politically; it’s just not the way we were raised. It’s like each person belongs to a different political party due to many reasons: their parents fought in the civil war, some close person or relative was lost during the war by the other political party, bla bla bla.. It all makes sense. Right?! Even if your bestfriend belongs to another political party, when there is some kind of any political voting, you are bound to hate her/him on the specific day. Oh but it’s not a biggy, you’ll probably go to Gemmayze with her/him after three days… That’s us. 3adeh!
However, I do want you to go back at least fifteen years back when you loved Tom and Jerry!
Seriously, imagine Tom without Jerry or Jerry without Tom!
*imagine! Don’t keep on reading*
I’m sure if Tom ever disappears, Jerry will put pictures of him all over the country on every single tree, pole, and wall he can reach (none-but that’s not the issue). I’m sure Jerry will mourn each day, cry for endless hours, sit alone in that wall-hole feeling bad for himself. Not a single cat will ever let him live the thrill Tom gives him.
If Jerry ever goes missing, Tom will be devastated. He’ll search each and every centimeter of cheese, wall-hole, and club sandwich he sights. The rest of the mice are too predictable, too naïve, he might even go vegetarian!!!
Now imagine Michel Aoun without Samir Geagea or Samir Geagea without Aoun!
*Now stop reading and imagine*
Don’t you see how the second Samir Geagea got out of jail, Aoun came back from France!?
I won’t label who is Tom and who’s Jerry, because you’d think I’m taking sides, and that is not the addressed issue.
Imagine Aoun becoming president and Samir Geagea is out of the picture. BORING! Would you still watch politics?! If I were you, I wouldn’t. What’s the use of politics without the poli-drama! Imagine Aoun saying some claim, and there is no Samir Geagea to oppose what he said. I think most Lebanese channels would shut down!
Imagine Aoun disappeared and the Lebanese forces are in charge. Yey yipi dou pou… BORINGG!! Wait, imagine all the talkshoes! Kalem El Neis! Just that. What would Marsel Ghanem talk about!? Health!? Pollution!? Barbies?! E32 dull! What about political comedy series, La Yumal, Basmet Watan….And the Rahbani Brothers! How could I forget them! What will their theaters’ subliminal messages be about?? Kleenex?!
Imagine our universities. There is only one of them^, the other doesn’t exist. What would happen on election days?! Would you really enjoy going to such days?! Well, I’d rather sleep at home or go sunbath. The anxiety of what will happen tomorrow during the election will all fade away. NDU people! Imagine Founder’s Day! There would be no competition! There would only be the drama clubs, the science clubs, and the music clubs. Peaceful people, no spice!! What about the connections? “This teacher in March14, he will give me an A!” what will happen to all the students’ GPAs!?
Plus, businessmen actually benefit from the members of their political parties. What would the business people do!??!?! What will happen to our economy!!!!!!!!!!!?
About the jokes! What will we joke about!? Blondes?! That’s too American! We’d lose our Lebanese nationality. Think about it!?
We want change!? NO WE DON’T.
Would you start a war tomorrow if they asked for it!? Seriously, the dude you’re with now belongs the the “TOM”s and you belong to the “JERRY”s, I know you’re not that light-headed to kill him! You might actually murder yourself instead (not because of being a good friend, but because of not knowing how to use a gun, spoiled Lebanese guy). Let’s not hate Aoun nor Geagea! Seriously do you actually think one of them will ever rule Lebanon solely!? Ofcourse not! Let’s just enjoy them like we enjoy Cartoon Network! Don’t get pissed and stuff, it’s not worth it, sit back, relax and enjoy the show, some popcorn might do.
Indeed, enjoy the drama, it’s an on-going drama, it will never end, it’s like our heritage, our legacy, our nationality.
You love Lebanon, Love it’s Poli-Drama 😉